It took me a while and a few tries to come up with a name for my blog. Creating a Visible Life comes from a kind of dark place in my life....but I am hoping (and believe) that bringing it out in the open and confronting it, maybe..just maybe...I can change things.
It feels like I have spent most of my life being invisible, or feeling invisible, or wishing that I was invisible. Does anyone else ever have those feelings? I think we have all wished to be invisible at some point in our lives but have you ever really felt like you actually are invisible? I remember times spent wondering why it felt like no one could see me when I was standing there screaming for help and everyone just passed by as if I wasn't there. To be fair, I was usually only screaming on the inside but I find it hard to believe that I am such a talented actress that I have always been able to hide it. Luckily, the screaming for help doesn't happen so much anymore (notice I didn't say it never happens) but the invisibility issue is still there and being dealt with every day. As I develop future postings I will talk about this in more detail.
How do I begin to fix this? How do I begin to "Create a Visible Life"? Do you see where I am going with the title now?
Step #1 - stop living in a beige world. I actually started this almost a year ago by painting my living room green. I have to admit that this only happened because my dad and stepmother came down in December last year and noticed that I had paint samples on my wall. Little did they know that they had been there quite a while because I couldn't make myself go any further. Well...my dad saw a "project" and there was no stopping the steamroller....so I now have a green living room. Thank goodness they pushed me to move forward..otherwise, I would still have just paint samples on my wall. I haven't been brave enough to paint any other room, but I do plan to paint my bedroom and the entry hall by the end of the year. I need you all to hold me to that.
These are pics of my living room. I will also be trying to decorate a little more (and declutter) as I also tend to live without much adornment. I will post updated pics as I go along. Any and all suggestions are appreciated.
Step #2 - Quit dressing in neutrals...take a chance....live on the edge. Interestingly, I do live on the edge. I takes lots of risks and live a life of laughs and fun and excitement....but my mode of dress does not portray that. So in the future, I will be buying a little flashier bling (fake bling of course) and lots of color and maybe even some patterns (that may be too much for me...but I will try). I will also post pics as I make some strides in this direction.
I guess most of the issues I have with my style, both dress and environment, stem from not knowing myself well enough to have my own style identified. I'm going to work on this. I think this could be a long journey but what else is life for right??? Hold on tight...could be quite a ride!!
Enough psychoanalysis for today...this is exhausting but wow it's nice to get it out in the open. Thanks for listening.
Please feel free to leave any comments/questions/help below in the comments section or I can be reached directly at creatingavisiblelife@gmail.com .
Next post - why I've never been creative...
Til then....Kathi
Posts
Of course the color you picked for the living room is amazing, as green is the greatest color there is. I think the name for your blog is perfect, based on what you are trying to accomplish<---(can't think of a better word) through it. Maybe it's hard to believe but I do understand what you mean by wanting/feeling invisible sometimes, but I hope you know that no matter how I acted, you have never been inivisble to me. Keep up the writing, you're doing great. Hope to hear more soon!
ReplyDelete-Zach
ReplyDeleteDoesn't say my name lol
and I'm not sure I like that it has your most recent blog at the top (that's where I started reading)
ReplyDelete