Side Bar Blog

I mentioned in the last blog that my next topic would be "Why I'm not creative".  I'm going to save this for next time as I would like to respond to some comments that were made on my last blog.  For those new to blog posts, if you scroll down to the bottom of my last post, you will see a place that says comments.  If you click on that, you can read the comments that were posted and/or post one of your own.  This comment button is on the bottom of each post.

If any of you have seen the movie "Julie and Julia", you may remember the scene where she is at work shortly after she has started blogging and all of a sudden yells out to her friend that someone has left her her first comment.  That is exactly how I felt this morning when I found that I had comments.  :-)

My #2 son was very sweet and commented on his mom's postings.  His comments, however, made me realize some interesting things about myself that I wanted to discuss.  He mentioned that he understood what I meant about feeling invisible or wanting to be invisible.  This made me start to wonder about the times I spent trying to be invisible to everyone that maybe I made those around me feel invisible too.  I'm not just talking about my family but my friends too.  The "practicing" Buddhist in me has spent most of the day trying to wrap my mind around this.  Since the first lesson we learn is that no one is a single entity.  We all are part of a whole and what any one person does affects the whole.

This made me feel a little melancholy today as I thought about this.  While I certainly would never want to make someone else feel like I don't see them, I never, never, never would want to make my sons think that they are invisible to me.  Nothing could ever be farther from the truth.....so let me attempt to make amends right now.  Please excuse my indulgence......

#1 Son - You are the son I always knew I would have from the time I understood I could have children one day.  You have filled my life with laughter, intelligence, kindness, baseball, loyalty and love.  You are everything and more than I could have ever wished for.  I honestly believe that you are further along on the enlightenment ladder than I am because you seem to have such a deep understanding of life.  I admire the quiet, generous, kind soul that you possess.  You are the most loyal and generous person I have ever met. I'm so lucky to have you in my life.

#2 Son - You were a little bit of surprise....I was sure I had the flu for the first couple of months....but low and behold....nine months later, I gave birth to a ray of sunshine.  You have brought happiness, common sense, good judgment and a spirit that lights up the world and everyone around you.  While I fly by the seat of my pants and make crazy spontaneous decisions, you have been the voice of reason...thank goodness.  It's funny to watch how people react to you.  Male or female just want to be near you and do things for you and just be in your presence.  I've never seen anything like it before.  You have also brought two beautiful girls into my life that I can not thank you enough for.  I love them both and am so happy to have them as part of the family circle.  Thank you for being you.


#3 Son - You were quite the surprise....I was sure it was just stress until one day I thought I felt a baby move.  I'm not sure why I lived in so much denial -).  Now I don't know what I would do without you.  You bring joy, fun, curiosity, baseball, marching band and a personality that has been wonderful to watch develop as you have grown up.  Everyone that meets you thinks you are "such a wonderful young man".  I can't count how many times I have been told that.  You are wonderful company to have around and even though we still have a few years to go before you go off to college (or a professional baseball career), I miss you already.  I thank my lucky stars everyday to have you here.

Ok....now that I got that said.....everyone needs to remember to be present.  Don't disappear....because when you leave...you also leave the good stuff behind and who knows what you are missing.  Nuff said....

Take care and have a great evening....

Next post (for sure) - Why I'm not creative.